---

BEEF SQUASh 'ER 

Attack Type: Pit Melee

Reach: 5ft.

Damage: 1d8 + 2 for every unsettled beef you’re willin’ to air out in front of the party. Go on, make it juicy.

Damage Type: Crushing, but also, like...bludgeoning. 

Weight: 4.20 lb. Premium GRADE

Cost: Nothin’ - except everyone now thinks you’re a petty gossip and knows you got UNSETTLED BEEF.

Look: You have got some UNSETTLED BEEF that CANNOT be squashed by words alone anymore. But like, everyone DESPERATELY wants to know about it, and they’re willing to look past the fact that you’re for real squashing your beefs, like literally, in a violent sort of way, to learn about ALL! THOSE! JUICY! DEETS! Oh my gooood...

Feel free to take up this sword against whatever enemies you face in whatever system you're playin' in. DTTWK.