i walked in circles around big houses. i found a tree that looked lovely to climb, but i was too scared to climb it. i walked closer to the tree... or was it another tree? i think it may have been another tree. i looked up into the tree. there was a slightly translucent red ribbon tied to a branch taller than me, hidden within the tree. i lifted my body slightly onto the front souls of my feet, untied the red ribbon, & took it with me.
i walked in circles around big houses, & in the knots of another tree's roots, i found a tiny table. it looked like children — or fairies — had created it by melting plastic & glitter together. it was a triangle of slightly translucent white plastic, with purple sparkles & tiny legs. i lifted the top piece, & there were tiny chairs underneath.
this entire day, i believed that i was in a different world — my world, not the ugly "real" world. i realized, days later, that when i found that red ribbon, & the fairy furniture, both in different trees, that they were real.
i want you to know how magical it was. it didn't feel real, so the most magical part was real-izing that it was real.
gOD talked to me again, asked me why i love the ugliest parts of the world they created, why i love their ugliest parts, as i touched the ugliest parts of the bark of a tree. they sounded sad. i asked gOd desperately, why they kept running away from me & reincarnating as somebody else. i cried. i told them that i love the last form i met them in. i told them that they're beautiful. i told you that you're beautiful.
in my dreams, i told god that they're beautiful.